Of all the questions I have asked before, this one received the least amount of responses because I believe it was too honest for most people but if I expect my informants to be honest, I have to be 100% honest as well, so I will answer the question first. Yes, I have cheated in a relationship. But the key to answering this question is not “Did you do it?” but it’s more so “Why did you do it?” and “How did you feel after you did it?” These questions matter much more than your first answer in my personal opinion. Before diving into my reasoning, I would like to say there is no legitimate reason to cheat. If you have the unyielding urge and truly cannot control it then maybe you should not be in a relationship to begin with. As for me, my decision came from long term curiosity and I did not have the restraint or the maturity to resist the opportunity when it presented itself. Although that was not the best decision I made, I definitely learned a lot from it and realized that is something I do not want to be a part of my intimate relationships. After doing it, I did not know how to feel. Part of me felt liberated because what had happened but the other part of me felt very guilty and regretful because I had jeopardized my relationship for temporary satisfaction.
“I cheated in a relationship because I wanted to see what something new felt like. I was thinking about my girlfriend the entire time.”
-Snapchat Follower
This quote brings me to brings me to a new question, “What do you do when you have that curiosity?” In this situation it was clear he still loved his girlfriend and he did not want to leave her but on the other hand he desired a new experience. Although cheating may not have been the right decision, what do you think the right alternative could have been? What would you have done in that dilemma?
“No, but if I did it would be with the person I’m suppose to be with”
-Snapchat Follower
Another very interesting answer I received to this question was the quote above and I really pondered this for a minute but it made sense. This particular person felt if someone could draw her out of her relationship then their connection was stronger than the person she was originally with. Again, cheating may not be the answer but this response displays the power of true love.
I understand this is a very touchy topic for most people and a lot of people are not willing to talk about it but there’s so much to learn from the difficult things to talk about. We all make mistakes in life but it’s not about what you did, it is about how you recover and learn from that mistake so you don’t do it again but on the other hand for some, it may have never been a mistake in the first place, but that’s for you to figure out… What are your thoughts, and of course thank you for your opinion.
Photographer: Crystal Smith. Find more of her work at Cvptureimages
Nen's Questions, Your Answers 
I have multiple times with multiple partners I plan on writing this out on my blog, but it’s proving to be a daunting task. I usually spill everything there. Being 9 months in recovery, I am at the point where I can safely take a look in my Pandora box. But I closed the list very quickly for now lol
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I appreciate the honesty, these things are definitely difficult to talk about especially when it comes to yourself but sometimes you just got to jump in head first and once you begin it will get easier.
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I believe that people cheat for numerous reasons. They are not happy or something important is missing. If people are together for a long time, they can grow apart, and the memories of what they used to be keep them in a relationship longer than they should be. We become content and accustomed to routine. Nobody likes change… why rock the boat right?
Just because you do not fight and you can tolerate the person (and even love the person), it does not mean you are happy. Being a zombie and just following routine every day can take a toll on your mental health… and you do not even realize its happening. Then something transpires. Someone is interested in you… or you find someone that you are interested in. All of a sudden – you feel alive again… and that feeling is so exhilarating that it makes you take a step back and realize it has been a long time since you felt anything.
In my experience – that feeling of being wanted, or craving the attention of another has made me feel so alive, that it was easy to be selfish. It is literally like a drug. When I have realized what my life has been lacking, I would justify that I owed it to myself to do what I wanted – because anything could happen, and it could be my last day on earth. You never know.
Do I regret some of the decisions that I made? Yes and no. I have cheated on someone I cared for and loved so much, but we were not the same couple anymore. Someone coming along and shaking up my world made me see how lifeless I have become, and helped me see that we have outgrown each other. A part of me does regret it, but I believe that the temptation served a purpose – and gave me that nudge to realize that although I loved him unconditionally, it was time for me to leave. Cheating was the end game for me to say goodbye (because I did love him, I could not continue to be deceitful)… but the relationship was over way before then.
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I appreciate the pure honesty of this comment. I could not have agreed more with the things you said and your perspective is really in line with mine. I think sometimes the most difficult or “regretful” decisions we make are the ones that define the people we become.
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I appreciate the pure honesty of this comment. I could not have agreed more with the things you said and your perspective is really in line with mine. I think sometimes the most difficult or “regretful” decisions we make are the ones that define the people we become.
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I love the honesty in the answers given to you.
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Wow great article!
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